Welcome to our newest segment, THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN, where Kevin Gootee and Kevin Israel each give you something that films try to pass off as a regular occurrence but NEVER HAPPENS. We’re not going to come out against the obvious stuff: lightsabers, using the Force, thinking DC and makes good movies. So here are tropes we’re sick of THAT DON’T HAPPEN.
Kevin Israel’s pick
Keys in the visor
I’m starting off with one of my favorites. I’m pretty sure no car owner in the past 30 years has ever left their keys in the sun visor. But, when our hero jumps into a stolen or abandoned car, they’ll search the glove compartment, the center console, then they’ll pull down the visor, and WHAM! Keys fall down like mana from heaven. That doesn’t happen! Maybe I grew up with neurotic parents, but if I ever just left spare keys in the visor of my dad’s car I woulda been riding my bike for a month. I get that it’s slightly more believable than every protagonist knowing how to jump start a car but, c’mon..the visor…again? Really!
KG: Could not agree more and let’s also add keys under your doormat in front of your home. Great way to have your place burglarized, just ask Ferris Bueller’s sister.
Kevin Gootee’s pick:
Geno Bisconte came on our podcast and did Uncut Gems and called out something they did that angered the shit out of me. Adam Sandler makes a 6 or 7 way parlay bet (you have to win ALL of the components of the parlay or you lose) and drops 100k to win in hopes of winning over a million. He hits not 1 but TWO of those parlays in this film. Any real gambler (yours truly and Geno) will tell you you’re better off buying a lottery ticket, wiping your ass, and betting on the Jets to win the superbowl than do a 7 way parlay. AND DROPPING 100K ON IT? Bet each component separately, sure! Hit 6/10 and you’re in the black. Sick of Hollywood taking long shot bets and glamorizing to the squares (people who don’t bet except maybe Superbowl)