One of the meanest movie villains EVER
KG here. Everyone loves the hero but sometimes, those villains are so goddamn mean, they surpass the hero and deserve solid recognition in film lore. And shoutout to Eric Albert who put a great March Madness style bracket where a bunch of comedians voted on who was the “Most Evil Bastard.”
1. Darth Vader. I mean c’mon. There’s no one better and will ever be anyone worse than him. And the last 5 minutes of Rogue 1, he FUCKED those Rebels up. Who’s more copied, quoted, beloved than Anakin Skywalker? NO ONE.
2. Mola Ram. Pulled out still beating hearts and kept kids as slaves? Jesus, only Ellen DeGeneres is more evil than him.
3. Clarence Boddicker. Can you fly, Bobby boy? BITCHES, LEAVE. Quote machine and he empties a shotgun into a cop at point blank range.
4. Simon Phoenix. Another quote machine while being just a sadistical, yet monster quote machine. Ask anyone recently “what’s their boggle?” I have and the look on their face is second to none.
5. Cyrus the Virus. Malkovich’s best role ever. And boy, did he have company on that flight. Throwing Chappelle out of a plane before he could get out a, “Fuck yo couch.” Wish he killed Colm Meaney’s character by dropping his car on him, what a blowhard.
6. Chong Li. Stomped out Ogre and gave a Brazilian dude a greenstick fracture. Threw a crushed up X-Lax into Van Dam’s face and made him put to use his 3 community college acting classes. Pure badass balls.
7. Oliver (Tim Robbins in Arlington Road) WOW! You see that ending coming? I didn’t. Rare time the bad guy wins excluding Bill Bellichick.
8. Max Cady. One of DeNiro’s roles people STILL talk about that’s pure evil.
9. Hans Landa. I thought Inglorious was FINE and Landa singlehandedly saved that film. The beer hall scene? The opening scene? Didn’t that send shivers up your butthole?
10. Biff Tannen. Yep, I said it. His whole family was a bunch of dickheads for 130 years (1885-2015). Hell, he even killed off George McFly and married Marty’s mom and put implants in her? Savage.
KI films
- Hans Lander – Inglorious Basterds: His opening monologue alone is enough to put him at the top of this list…oh, and that whole Nazi thing.
- Hans Gruber – Die Hard: Clearly if your name your kid “Hans,” you’re trying to breed a villain
- Sensei John Kreese – Karate Kid: “Sweep the leg!” I think that’s all I need to say.
- Buffalo Bill – Silence of the Lambs: If you’ve ever told someone to “put the lotion in the basket” you’ll know why this twisted nutcase makes my list.
- Jigsaw – Jigsaw: I really think Jigsaw upped the game for all future bad guys.
- Anton Chigurh – No Country for Old Men: That haircut, that bolt pistol, that total lack of emotion. What an asshole!
- Johnny Ringo – Tombstone: No, I’m sure of it….I hate him.
- Gollum – LOTR: This skinny dickhead. I hated him in the movies and I hate all the impressions.
- The Terminator – Terminator: I know he had a face-turn in the sequel, but man, Arnold was straight nasty in the original!
- John Doe – Seven: Any villain who puts that much thought into his killing belongs on the list. He rivaled Jigsaw.
